Why Write About Addiction and its Impacts?

I write about depression and addiction to (hopefully) help other people who are going through the same mindfuck called life as me. Instead of digging a bigger psychological hole for yourself, you can successfully address addiction and related depression and move on.

I have spent thousands of hours doing things I regret, psychologically raping my self-esteem through petty activities that achieve mostly nothing. Yes, it's called filling in the gaps when you're not at work or school, such as writing this article?

The difference is that this article makes me feel better about myself and hopefully helps you!

You don't have to be a hardcore drug or alcohol addict to have problems and become depressed. Open an application when you should be working and stay there for two or three hours! That's where it starts. When addiction gets hold it doesn't abate until it leaves you dry and sick of yourself to the core. An addictive mind will settle for nothing else and will keep on going until it's fed up and considers taking extreme action. Suicide for some people springs to mind, especially because of the pressures of social media! You get more depressed because you achieve relatively nothing, then more depressed and so on.

A quick hour at this or that won’t hurt you tell yourself on hundreds of different occasions, but suddenly, your whole day/week/year has disappeared and all productivity has gone. Your mind plays tricks on you when you're feeling most vulnerable, when you're having a bad day or feeling stressed and, frustratingly, when you’ve managed to beat your addiction for an extended period. Just when you start feeling good about yourself! You convince yourself that a quick dabble won't hurt. Suddenly you're wasting time without even realizing it.

Excessive procrastination goes round in circles and you're never fully satisfied, often feeling ashamed of yourself for having no control and for clearing out the proverbial fridge. It's repetitive cycle of non-achievement that can make you feel depressed.

If you don't feel good about yourself due to lack of self-respect, esteem and control, you're not going to feel good about other people. Life can become a horror show of introverted shame, which is impossible to overcome when you can't even admit it to yourself.

Try and break the cycle.

The irony about addiction-depression is the short-term enjoyment you get from it, but long term very little.

The additional problem is one type of addiction can subtly lead to others. These are triggers. If you do anything in excess, take too many drugs or booze it up too often, your life can become a mirror of that and, because your self-esteem becomes low, it doesn't matter if you indulge further or into other addictions that make you feel worse. Once you better understand the addiction-depression cycle and vice versa you can start to do something about it and get happiness back into your life.

You can break the cycle.

Writing about addiction is rather depressing, self-defeating and addictive in itself, but if you're reading this far then I am hopefully reaching out to you? Maybe even achieving a spiritual goal or form of self-exorcism.

This isn't religious or about becoming a believer, but about getting more focus in your life when there's so much junk and distractions out there that such away your life before you realize it's happening.

Express how you really feel, admit addiction is a thing and do yourself a favor. Cut out the distractions and start to feel better about your life and self.